- User having trouble creating a new password: "It's flrglb12." Security pilot fish: That's the trouble -- our system won't let you create a password that contains two consecutive numbers. Puzzled user: "Twelve is only one number."
Up to his elbows clearing a communications glitch for a customer, this sysadmin pilot fish is interrupted by his own CEO's secretary. The boss needs you, she says. Fish waves her off, but two minutes later, she's back: "He wants to see you now." Fish has to leave the customer hanging and reports to the boss, who says, "Get your hammer -- I need you to hang this outside the computer room." It's a huge, framed motivational poster. And it works, says fish: "It motivated me to call a recruiter the next week."
Caller: "I'm having problems accessing my application." Tech support pilot fish: Did you load the latest patches? Caller: "What patches? I haven't received any notification." Fish: The email was sent out at 11.15 Central time this morning. Caller: "Oh, that's the problem. I'm in California, so I won't get them for another two hours."
"This PC was running fine," overseas user tells support pilot fish, "but now it won't boot." Was anything changed or added? fish asks. "No, everything is the same as it was before." Before what? "Before the flood," user says. "But it's all dry now."
Missing the point
User at a business services company sends a mass emailing to 500 clients, but when some bounce because of spam filters, she turns to pilot fish for help. "She wanted us to contact the sysadmins of the various bounced domains," fish sighs, "to ask them if they'd remove their spam filters so that she could complete her mailing!"
I go GIGO
My printer keeps jamming all day long, and I keep clearing the jam, clerk complains. Support pilot fish investigates -- and finds the problem. "The clerk was taking the crinkled paper that jammed," fish reports, "and putting it back into the paper tray."
Executive secretary at this R&D lab hits support pilot fish regularly for help. "One day, I notice she keeps all her files on her on-screen desktop, which is a cluttered mess," fish says. Curious, he asks her why. "She tells me she keeps them out of the hard drive," fish sighs, "so they'll be safe if her hard drive ever fails."
Feed the Shark!