Joke upgraded for Vista
Back in the day when Windows 95 rolled out there was much consternation about 32 Bit Processing and what it meant, pilot fish recalls. One of my users asked me about the "32 Bit Thing" and I (jokingly) told him that when he powered down a machine, he had to wait for 32 seconds before powering it back on. This allowed for the bits to clear out their memory, I said, thinking I was being funny. Imagine my surprise, last year in 2007, 12 years later, when I get a call: "You ........ !" "32 Seconds, my ....... !" "When I asked him what he was talking about (I'd long forgotten about my little joke), he said: 'I told a guy that since we are now on Vista 64 Bit, that he would have to wait 64 seconds after powering the machine down'."
The printer blues I was called to an office to check a printer that had "quit working", fish says. "When I arrived and looked at the printer I found a paper jam. Pretty easy to clear, only one sheet of paper. "After I removed the paper and restarted the printer, the data light was on. So I turned the PC it was attached to on and the print jobs started. All 30 of them. All 30 of the exact same document. "Because, you know, obviously, trying (unsuccuessfully) to print something 29 times isn't enough to convince this user that it just isn't going to print — she had to give it another go, to round the number up to 30."
Ex-helpdesker needs help Pilot fish gets an email at the helpdesk from a lady in another department. She asks fish to "clean two active directory accounts". Ok, no problem. I'm thinking the two people have changed offices and have new phone numbers or something like that, but no details were provided. "So, I email her back and ask, "What needs to be "cleaned"?", fish recalls. "She emails back with....and I'm typing it the way she did...."There AD accounts". I recognised, from her first email, that something needed to be "cleaned" in THEIR AD accounts, so I wrote back asking, "What, in their AD accounts, needs to be cleaned?" She wrote back with, "Delete their accounts." So nothing needed to be cleaned. Instead, the accounts needed to be deleted. With most people in our organisation, I wouldn't see this as a big issue, and would get a slight chuckle from it...HOWEVER....she worked the helpdesk, that I am now working, for several years before she moved to another position in another department."